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Painting by numbers

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Litres of paint spread on the walls: 15
New lampshades bought and fitted: 3
Hours of Radio 4 consumed: 27
Number of times a presenter has almost induced a brush-flung-at-radio incident: 8
Cheese and Onion pasties eaten: 3
…and quiches: 1
…biscuits: 25
Cups of tea drunk: 17
…and coffee: 8
…blackcurrant and apple juice: 2
Paintbrushes ruined: 4
Rollers rolled: 2
Thumbs sliced open: 1
Walls painted: 28
Ceilings still left to smarten up: 1
Doors dripped on: 5
Neighbourhood cats tickled: 2

I think, in short, the flat is ready for sale.

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